Today is President’s Day in the U.S., but before we get to that, I want to continue our discussion on couples and money.
I’ve been thinking a lot about this topic, especially this week.
I talked to a relationship coach on IG last Friday about why couples fight, and she taught me a lot about relationships. So of course you can go watch the interview on IG and below.
Here are the highlights:
About 5:00 in:
“There's this misconception that the right partner, the right partnership is free from conflict. And it's all cake and rainbows of the time. And that's just not true.”
8:09 – Why do we fight? And what’s underneath the fighting? Coach Bex says:
“I think what lies underneath all of that are needs that are not met.”
10:14 – Based on our childhood beliefs, the way that we relate with money may not align with how our partner relates with money. This is at the crux of conflict.
11:08 Coach Bex shares her experience with a partner who didn’t tell her that he was in thousands of dollars in debt.
12:33 I share my experience with financial infidelity from an ex.
13:41 Is there one tool to NOT fight as much?
14:02 Coach Bex says:
“our goal in partnership isn't necessarily to not fight as much, but to have more constructive conversation because conflict is gonna happen.”
16:12 How to have a more constructive conversation, especially during conflicts.
18:26 How do we, especially as women, ask for what we need in a relationship?
19:26 When we grow up in a more punishing environment, where we were spanked or punished, it may be more challenging for us to speak up for what we need, so what can we do, to shift from fear to be able to use our voice?
23:00 Get really quiet on what you truly need. We need quiet time for ourselves.
By the way, if you need or want a transcript, please let me know, and I’ll send it to you.
Now, Coach Bex and I have free gifts for you, as you navigate love and relationships.
Coach Bex’s gift is her six essential skills independent women need to attract and grow an equal, healthy relationship.
And my gift…limited to just this month... The Couples Guide to Money…
Now, for President’s Day, here are 15 presidential quotes on leadership. I really relate to these because one of my core values is being proactive or taking ownership of your life, and most of these quotes align with that value… Hope these inspire you to take action on what you would like to change.
George Washington: "99% of failures come from people who make excuses."
John Adams: "If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader"
Thomas Jefferson: "Whenever you do a thing, act as if all the world were watching."
Andrew Jackson: "Any man worth his salt will stick up for what he believes is right, but it takes a slightly better man to acknowledge instantly and without reservation that he is in error."
Martin Van Buren: "It is easier to do a job right than to explain why you didn't."
Abraham Lincoln: "Leave nothing for tomorrow which can be done today."
Theodore Roosevelt: "It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed."
Franklin D. Roosevelt: "The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today."
Harry S. Truman: "It's amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit."
Dwight D. Eisenhower: "By leadership we mean the art of getting someone else to do something that you want done because he wants to do it, not because your position of power can compel him to do it."
John F. Kennedy: "Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction."
Gerald R. Ford: "Never be satisfied with less than your very best effort. If you strive for the top and miss, you'll still 'beat the pack.'"
William J. Clinton: "If you live long enough, you'll make mistakes. But if you learn from them, you'll be a better person. It's how you handle adversity, not how it affects you. The main thing is never quit, never quit, never quit."
Barack Obama: "Change will not come if we wait for some other person, or if we wait for some other time."