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Goals: How to Set Them and How to Stick to Them

Part 3 - Get Real

· clarity,goals,goal-setting,resolutions,financial goals

Our guest blogger, Tilita Lutterloh, aka Coach T, is back to continue our January 4-part series on goals and goal-setting. Enjoy!



Ahh, the warm sunshine, the gentle breeze, the mist of rain and the fabulosity of drag queens was the perfect environment to ease myself into this new year! Thank you San Juan, Puerto Rico for helping set the tone for my 2024 year of creative exploration... yaasss, more drag queen energy, please! 💃🏾


As much as I would have loved to stay for another week, life called to say, "Get real sweety, we've got goals to reach!"

Which is exactly what we’re doing this week with Part 3 of Goals: How to Set Them and How to Stick to Them!


It’s not enough to simply dream and imagine and set exciting goals and expect to live in bliss once we reach the goals.


We have to Get Real about what it takes to get what we want… and be honest with ourselves about whether or not we are ready, willing, and able to do what it takes.


Consider the goal(s) you chose to focus on this year.


👉🏾 Where are you at right now as it relates to that goal?

👉🏾 How long do you think it will take to reach the goal?

👉🏾 What does it really take to actually accomplish such a goal?


Why is it important to get real?


Four reasons...

  • So you don’t waste time and energy on actions that don’t really matter.


  • So you don’t make the goal-digging process harder than it needs to be… working towards big meaningful goals is challenging enough, why work even harder?


  • So you don’t kid yourself… Managing expectations will help you avoid energy-sucking surprises and debilitating disappointment.


  • So you show up authentically as your true self in everything you do… Psst, it’s a lot less exhausting that way.


So do that this week… Get Real!


Step 1 - Answer this question:

What do I need to let go of or leave behind in 2023 in order to go after what I want, all in?  


Step 2 - List out the answers to this question:  

What street cred do I have? What evidence do I have that shows I have at least an ounce of a chance of getting what I want?


Step 3 - List out the answers to this question:   

What do I need to acquire in order to achieve my goal? What characteristics, habits, knowledge, behavior, skills do I need to acquire in order to increase my chances of accomplishing my desired goal?

The habitual behavior specifically will help you become “the type of person who…” which reveals the actions and habits to adopt as you gradually shift your lifestyle and identity to align with your values and your goals.


See if you can come up with at least 5 habits that this type of person implements.


Step 4 - Answer this question:

Do these habits and behaviors align with my values and how I want to show up in the world?


If the answer is no, or you don’t have a good feeling about the possible answer to this question, the goal may not be for you. And that’s ok. Head back to your Field of Play to see what other goals really resonate for you right now.


Or you’ve simply got more digging to do in order to discover what it will take for you to get right with what lies ahead on your path toward your goal.


Step 5 - Try on a different habit each day this week to see how they feel. It’s like trying on a new pair of shoes. It takes time to break them in, to get used to them, which in turn makes you walk a bit differently, carry yourself in a new way.

And shoes don’t just magically jump onto your feet! You intentionally put them on your feet. Same with goal-digging habits… intention that leads to action done consistently that leads to change, where these actions and habits become part of the natural rhythm of your life.   


“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.” - Aristotle


Right on!


Now, there’s one thing I want you to understand… if you don’t get anything else from this post, please get this…


Once you understand what knowledge, habits, mindset, and behavior it really takes to achieve the goal you’ve set for yourself, how you go forth and conquer is not about perfection. It’s not about changing your identity and becoming this person 24/7/365.


It’s about creating the right environment to increase the likelihood of your success…


It’s about putting things into practice more often than not…


It’s about that good ole’ 80/20 rule - 80% of your results come from 20% of your efforts, focus, action – essentially the big bang for your buck concept…


Which is all about EFFICIENCY so you don’t need to do ALL the things…


Just the right things that elicit the most return on your investment…


So you’re not in a perpetual state of exhaustion or overwhelm or burnout.


Alrighty, next week, we’ll Get Movin’ so your body can help facilitate your goal-digging adventure this year.


In the meantime, I’ll be catching up on all the emails I missed while I was immersed in vacation bliss this past week! And I’ll be more than happy to answer any questions that come up for you during this goal-digging series. Just drop ‘em below.

Peace & Goal-Digging,

Coach T



With lots of GRATITUDE,

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